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How to be Happy (in a Sad Sad World)

posted 30 Nov 2010, 06:05 by Mpelembe   [ updated 30 Nov 2010, 06:07 ]

Hello! Are you happy? If not, why not?

Don't tell me - you've forgotten how to be happy!

Or maybe, just maybe, no-one ever told you how to find
happiness in the first place - no-one ever needed to.

Well, the fact that you're reading these words tells me that
you just might, might be interested in reminding yourself
about the art of happiness.

So, are you ready?

HOW TO BE HAPPY? The answer: be, just be.

Okay, so what does that mean exactly, to just be? Well, let
me explain what it doesn't mean, instead; it doesn't mean
you'll be happy...

* When you finally marry and have children * When you
finally get that great job * When you live in that fantastic
big house you've always dreamed of * When nothing 'bad'
happens in the world (e.g. natural or not-so-natural
disasters) * When you're slim again, etc.

(Nor will you be happy when you're young again as - modern
science notwithstanding - you only ever get older, in this

Talking of which, happiness isn't something that only
happens in the past, either. No, you can only ever be happy
in the present moment.

And, yes, achieving happiness is much simpler than having to
achieve certain things in life. Being happy is much simpler.
Just be.

And that basically means, that wherever you are in life and
whatever good or bad things are going on, tell yourself that
this is my life - this is how it is right now, I accept and
am grateful.

Yes, it's okay to want 'things' to be better / taller /
richer / smaller / quicker / slower... but right now... this
- is - your -life!

If you can "be" with that, if you can find gratitude for
your life right now - THEN you'll be happy. Not "happy ever
after" happy but "happy now" happy.

That's how to be happy - in my opinion, anyway.

Don't believe me?

Okay, let's you and I play a game in the next few minutes.
It's a quick game, an easy game, and it's a game that's
bound to put a smile on your face.

Okay, think of three times when you remember being happy.
Right now, just three times - in as much detail as you can.
Go back as far back into your life as you can and pick three
moments that made you smile or cry or laugh, or made you say:
"Thanks - this is good!"

Now try and remember exactly *why* these moments were
moments of happiness for you. Ask yourself what 'great
thing' had been achieved at the time.

And I'm guessing that the moments in question were actually
quite simple moments, where nothing 'great' had happened at
all - it was simply special, that's it. I'm guessing that
you even re-experienced this moment another time and it
didn't make you feel quite as happy that time. I'm guessing
that your original happiness came about because you were
simply being in the moment and okay with it.

That's what I'm guessing.

I'm also guessing that - at least if you played the game
above, anyhow - that you're feeling a bit happier right this
minute. Why? Has anything in the world changed in the last
few moments, *other than* your focus?

So happiness really is quite a simple matter. It happens in
the moment, in each moment where we truly accept "what is".

Which might lead you to asking another question of me: well,
Steve, what is happiness then?

Well, it's the subject of another article, but I think it
goes a little like how Dennis Waitley sees it below...

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or
consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living
every minute with love, grace and gratitude." -- Denis

About the Author:

Steve M Nash believes that you are your own self help guru.
And that's why he created
- to let you help yourself, and help others too. You can
read more about 'how to be happy' (and share your views) at
this page